~~~~
"Have you even left the house
tonight?" I asked my roommate as I placed her drink on the table. She was
more interested in the drama show on the television than my question, "at
least answer me."
"I'll go out tomorrow,"
she brushed me off and reached for her drink.
"You've said that for the past
eight nights," I snapped.
"Whatever," she ignored me
and sipped her drink. "Gross is this tomato juice," she spat out her
drink.
"We ran out of your special
wine last night," I informed her, "no I'm not buying you more if you
want some get it yourself."
"I wasn't going to ask
that," she got defensive.
"Yes, you were," I glared.
"No I wasn't..." she
mumbled sheepishly.
"Come on the night is still
young," I encouraged her, "you can make it to the store and back
before your shows over."
"Nah," she waved her hand dismissively,
"I'll just stick to the tomato juice for now."
"Are you serious?" I asked
my roommate.
In turn, she gave me a, "why
are you still talking, stop bothering me," look.
"I wouldn't be on your case if
you didn't refuse to go out during the day," I told her.
"You know I can't go out in
sunlight," my roommate made a faux horrified expression. "Think of
what would happen to my poor skin."
"Yeah, yeah," I shook my
head, "and your garlic allergy, and your silver allergy. Your sensitivity
to 90% of all water, and how the sight of churches makes you faint."
"Well when you put it that way
I sound like a real picky jerk," she commented, "stop that."
"Ugh, you're impossible, fine
watch your stupid show," I gave up and went to the kitchen.
"It's not stupid," she
stood up in shock, offended I dared to mock her favorite show. "It's the
highest rated drama this season, it's won like eight awards and has fans all
around the-"
"Yeah sure," I walked out
of earshot of her rant. I'd give her a harder time, but she did pay for our
apartment with her monumental savings. Plus, I don't need one of her, "I'm
the breadwinner here," fits. Not that she's worked a day in the past
century. Just another day when your roommate is a lazy vampire I guess.
~~~~
What a twist! And thus completes my accidental trilogy of stories centered around mundane complaints (first bad fast food restaurants, then online dating, now finally lazy roommates). It would have been perfect if "Bad Seafood" had a fantasy twist as well, but live and learn.
As for the story itself, this was another silly story that popped into my mind one day and basically wrote itself. The idea of a vampire roommate who's just a lazy couch potato was too perfect to pass up. Maybe I'll extend this concept another day.
Until then, Read, Comment and Enjoy.
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