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Tuesday, January 7, 2020

Strange Sci-fi Tales - A Tale From Robot Tech Support [#152]

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           “Have you tried turning yourself off and on again?” The jaded IT employee asked from the other side of the phone line.
           “Of course,” the robot replied, “I’ll just flip my power switch on with the arms that don’t work because I turned the power off.”
           “Can you do a power reset?” The employee inquired.
           “Don’t you think I’ve tried that?” The robot snapped.
           “Please sir, the operation must be performed before we can begin troubleshooting,” the IT employee insisted.
           “Fine,” the robot replied before clicking a switch on their side. Over the course of a few minutes the robot shut down and powered on, yet their nebulous problem persisted. “There, nothing changed.”
           “Okay sir, let’s begin basic troubleshooting,” the IT guy sighed, “when did you last update yourself?”
           “Yesterday,” the robot answered.
           “Have you installed any third-party software recently?” He continued.
           “About a year ago, is that recent enough for you?” The robot became more frustrated.
           “Have you changed any important hardware or software setting recently?”
           “No and no,” the robot almost screamed into the receiver.
           “Hmm, I might have to check with my supervisor, we might not cover this kind of problem,” the employee droned.
           “Are you serious? You barely even know what the problem is,” The robot yelled.
           “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to calm down, or I’ll have to disconnect the call,” the IT guy warned.
           “Get me your supervisor, I want to lodge a complaint,” the robot declared.
           “I apologize if my service has not been up to your standard, sir,” the employee stated flatly. “However, due to the Anti-Botting Law enacted last year, all robot complaints must be submitted through an online customer satisfaction survey on our website.”
          “Don’t you pass the buck, everyone knows that isn’t how that law is supposed to work,” the robot countered.
           “Sir, this is your second warning, if you yell at me again I’ll disconnect the call,” the IT guy reminded him.
           “Listen here, it’s your job to fix me, and you’re doing a pretty terrible job,” the robot growled. “Don’t make me have to report you and your company for poor service. Maybe I should-” Before the robot could finish his sentence, the call was disconnected. “Hello? You lazy-” He smashed the receiver.

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When customer and hardware become the same thing, temperamental is the only word that can describe the result. 

Until next time, Read, Comment and Enjoy 
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